In a new interview with CBS News, Carrie Underwood reveals that she had three miscarriages within the last two years. And, as she explains in the interview, coping with those experiences influenced quite a few of the songs on her new album, Cry Pretty.
"I'd kind of planned that 2017 was, you know, going to be the year that I work on new music and I have a baby," Underwood says in the interview. And although she became pregnant early in 2017, she says it "didn't work out." She got pregnant again in the spring of 2017 and a third time in early 2018, but, again, the pregnancies "didn't work out," she said. "So, at that point, it was just kind of like, 'OK, like, what's the deal? What is all of this?'"
Underwood says she threw herself into her work and dealt with her emotions behind closed doors—an experience she sings about on Cry Pretty's title track.
"Throughout the whole process, you know, I'm writing and, like, literally right after finding out that I would lose a baby, I'd have a writing session, I'd be like, 'Let's go. You know, I can't just sit around thinking about this. Like, I wanna work, I wanna do this,'" she said. "'Cause I would literally have these horrible things going on in my life, and then have to go smile and, like, do some interviews or, like, do a photo shoot or something, you know? So it was just kind of, like, therapeutic."
Part of the frustration for her was that she realized how much was going right in her life. "I had always been afraid to be angry because we're so blessed… Really what can I complain about? I can't." she said. At a certain point, though, "I got mad," she said.
She continued, "I feel like there's several songs on the album that came from that, you know, or I connect with in a totally different way because of those experiences that we went through." And those experiences were hard, she says, "but things are looking better."
As SELF wrote previously, miscarriages are probably more common than most of us realize.
Miscarriages occur in about 10 percent of known pregnancies according to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG). But repeated pregnancy loss is rare.
It's estimated that less than 5 percent of women will have two or more consecutive miscarriages, SELF explained previously, and less than 1 percent will have three or more. These rare cases can be caused by a ton of different issues, including uterine abnormalities, hormone issues, or underlying conditions, such as uncontrolled diabetes.
But, as Underwood proves, even these circumstances don't necessarily mean you'll never become pregnant. In August, she revealed in a video posted to her Twitter account that she was happily pregnant with her second child.